These Grooms Chose an Iconic Downtown Hotel for Their City-Chic Nuptials in Washington, D.C.

In September 2019, executive management consultant Hunter Smith jumped at the chance to leave Washington, D.C., for a job in London. Though he told his friends he was moving to advance his career and travel around Europe, they had other ideas. "His friends all joked that he’d be coming back in a few years with a British husband with a 'posh accent.' Hunter shrugged this off with laughter at the time, but it turns out his friends were right!" the grooms say.

A year—and several pandemic lockdowns—later, Hunter and classical musician Daniel Bates found each other on Tinder and immediately hit it off. For their first date, they met up for an outdoor walk around their favorite neighborhood in London. "Dan walked up to Hunter, they made eye contact and smiled, and it was truly love at first sight," says the couple. They discussed their mutual passion for music, both having grown up classically trained, and their hopes and dreams for the future. They laid all the cards on the table—from their mutual desire to get married and have children to what they wanted out of a life partner. "It just felt right from day one," they say.

In October 2022, Dan proposed on the beach in Hilton Head, South Carolina, where Hunter's family lives, and the couple began planning their September 30, 2023, wedding for 140 guests in Washington, D.C. They chose the iconic Hay-Adams hotel for its unmatched views of the city, and worked with Lois Gaul of Kelley Cannon Events to design a palette of "classic elegance with a chic, modern, and masculine vibe." The men split their planning to-do list, with each tackling different elements of the event. "Hunter focused on the design of the room, end to end. Meanwhile, Dan organized the extensive music, which was a favorite among our attendees—he even hand-composed much of it!" says the couple. "Honestly, [it was] a blast! We are both creatives and really enjoyed making a vision come to life."

The personalized details, from custom artwork on the signature drink signs to a lineup of world-class musicians performing at the ceremony and cocktail hour, made the day unforgettable for the couple—and their guests. "Special and unique details make all the difference," say Hunter and Dan. "Many people will have opinions (coming from a good place!) about what you should or should not do at your wedding. Remember, this is your day as a couple. In the end, what people will remember about your wedding is the feeling and love in the room—it is truly palpable."

City Chic

Hunter and Dan previewed their "classic D.C." aesthetic with an invitation suite from The Dandelion Patch that included an intricate map of the city on the envelope liner and a sketch of the city’s most famous monuments on their details card. The letterpress invitation—with gold-foiled font and a custom crest—and the accompanying cards were wrapped in vellum and secured with a wax seal. "100 percent the set was chic and elegant—with a masculine touch," says the couple.

Fine Feathers

Hunter wore a classic tuxedo, personalized with a deep green tuxedo jacket and patent leather loafers. "Hunter has a love for all things green, so the bold tux color did not come as a surprise to most!" says the couple. 

But it was his guinea feather studs and cufflinks that were especially meaningful. "They belonged to a dear family friend who had passed away several months before the wedding," says the couple. "He had planned to be at the wedding, and upon his passing, his wife gave them to Hunter." Hunter chose a black goose feather bow tie and a white goose feather pocket square from Brackish to tie the look together (his father chose a coordinating set, too).

Dressed to Impress

For his wedding day-attire, Dan asked one of his friends—London-based tailor Mark Powell, whose clients include George Clooney and Naomi Campbell—to design a timeless black dinner jacket. The finishing touch: gold cufflinks made by Dan’s father, Terry.

On Top of the World

Hunter and Dan made the most of their hotel’s jaw-dropping views by sharing their first look at the venue’s high balcony, with the White House and monuments as a backdrop. Before their meeting, they felt the same: "The feeling was, 'Let’s do this!'" they say. "Full of happiness and excitement." As they saw each other for the first time, neither could contain their smiles. "Dan was just so excited to see what Hunter would wear because it was kept secret!" says the couple. "It was such an intimate moment."

Party People

Each groom invited seven of their nearest and dearest to stand alongside them during the ceremony. The formal dress code allowed each groomsman to choose his tuxedo—with black velvet bow ties and white-and-gold pocket squares provided by Hunter and Dan. The women wore black gowns of their choosing—with just two requirements. "We wanted to make sure we kept it easy for the ladies and that they would have a dress they each loved and would wear again!" say the grooms. "Thus, we said floor-length black dress of your choice, and in Hunter’s words … 'Make it flirty, ladies!'"

Custom Framing

Hunter envisioned a gold-framed ceremony backdrop draped with flowers and greenery. "Our florist had this custom built and made it come to life," he says. "Down the aisle, we did ferns with white snapdragons coming out, which we later repurposed throughout the reception."

Instrumental Efforts

Dan, a principal oboist for three orchestras, curated a thoughtful selection of ceremony music, including his own arrangements of Bach's Goldberg Variations, Humperdinck’s Hansel and Gretel, and Wagner’s Die Meistersinger. He invited his closest friends to perform: The group included clarinetist Katherine Spencer; oboist Harrison Linsey; violinists Andre Swanepoel and Jenny Chang; violists Mark Coates Smith and Jim Kelly; harpist Gréta Kristín Ásgeirsson; violoncellist Rosie Biss; and conductor Evan Rogister.

Notes From Home

As a surprise for Hunter, Dan hired bagpiper Duncan Moore to perform the national anthems of both the United States and the United Kingdom during the processional—a nod to each groom’s home country and to the guests who traveled to celebrate with the couple.

Hand in Hand

Hunter and Dan walked down the aisle together to begin their ceremony. Singer Melissa Wimbish performed one of the couple’s favorite songs, "That’s Him" by Kurt Weill. While the entire slate of music that Dan organized is one of the couple’s favorite memories of the day, their ceremony music still stands out. "With both our national anthems played by the bagpiper, friends playing and conducting, our first special song being sung by an opera singer as we walked down the aisle, a harpist … [it was] just so special!" they say.

In Their Own Words

Hunter and Dan worked with Reverend Christina Rock of Ceremony Officiants to customize their ceremony. "We put a lot of thought into each word," they say. "We wrote our own vows, which left everyone, including ourselves, in tears! This seemed like an easy idea at first—but my, what a task! Highly recommend, though, as we will cherish each other’s vows for a lifetime ahead."

Happy Tears

As the men shared their handwritten vows, even the wedding party was brought to tears. "We both were not expecting the wedding to be such a tearjerker, but it had everyone welled up!" they say. "Hunter’s wedding party got so emotional, and only one of his grooms ladies had a tissue sneakily in her dress. When she dabbed her eyes with it, the rest of the wedding party whispered to share it—they ended up splitting one tissue into seven shreds! It’s meaningful and also hilarious; you can see the shred of tissue in many of the photos!"

Just Married

Hunter focused his vows around the men’s shared love of music and a future that includes "creating the symphony of their lives together," he says, "ending with 'our life will become a masterpiece that even the greats have not composed. To be yours, through perfect harmony, or even when the pitch goes sharp, this Daniel Bates, I vow to you.'" Dan highlighted Hunter’s commitment and connection to his family and friends while quoting favorite lyrics from their processional song. "He finished by promising to make [me] feel (as the song goes) 'The way you feel when the fireflies glimmer, the way you feel when overnight your hips grow slimmer!'" says Hunter.

Street Style

After the ceremony, the newlyweds took a few unscheduled minutes for impromptu photos outside the hotel. "It was super important for us to be at a good portion of the cocktail hour!" they say. "[But we are] so glad Amanda encouraged us to do these because these photos ended up being some of our favorites!"

That's Amor

Dan also surprised Hunter with a mariachi band that led the couple and their guests from the end of the ceremony to the beginning of the cocktail hour, followed by another performance from the clarinetist and string players. "When the musicians played, it was so striking that it literally silenced a room of 140 people chatting—everyone just listened," says the couple. "Some people even cried at how beautiful it was!"

What's In a Name

Hunter and Dan chose two specialty cocktails: A "Fitz Spritz," named after their dog, and "Ray Ray’s Manhattan," a nod to Hunter’s father’s favorite drink. "We had the signs commissioned from an artist back in London who designs some of Dan’s music festival programs—his work is very near and dear to us," says the couple.

Sparkle and Shine

A gold sequined cloth created a shimmering accent for the couple’s crisp, formal escort cards—each with a wax seal in one of the event’s signature colors.

Setting the Bar

The soft ferns that lined the ceremony aisle were moved into the reception space, providing a natural, organic accent to the opulent metallics that grounded the design aesthetic. "We had gold and amber uplighting through the room and a pin spot hanging from the ceiling on each floral arrangement to highlight it," says the couple. "One of our absolute favorite things we rented was the gold geometric mirror bars, which we placed at each end of the room."

Up in the Air

Hunter took the lead on the design of the reception space. "We wanted gorgeous florals in a classic color palette that still had a bit of a masculine edge—hard to do!" he says. A variety of greenery in different textures and shapes added a modern complement to lush white blooms in arrangements set on tall gold frames. "Also, we had TONS of candles in all sorts of varieties—you can’t overdo it with candles," says the couple.

Golden Touch

Gold chargers, glassware, and flatware reflected the warm, intimate candlelight. "Linens were ivory and had a lot of texture and dimension to add interest," says Hunter. Individual fern leaves set into each folded napkin—atop personalized menus—matched the timeless elegance of the venue. 

The Big Reveal

One of Hunter and Dan’s favorite moments of the day was their private room reveal. "The design element was so important to Hunter, and the room took his breath away–literal jaw drop," says the couple. "When Dan saw it, he was [so] blown away that it actually brought him to tears—a rarity! It was a quiet, intimate moment for us where we really marveled at the beauty of all the hard work we had created in putting this special space together."

Their First Dance

Hunter swapped his green tuxedo jacket for a gold velvet version before the couple’s first dance—to At Last by Etta James. "We think she is one of the greatest of all time—and we truly waited to find our true love, at last," they say.

Sweet Moments

Buttercream Bakeshop provided the couple with a three-tiered almond cake, filled with blueberry jam and cream-cheese buttercream. Green-and-white marbled fondant was accented by the couple’s custom crest in shimmering gold. 

Sources

• Photographer: Amanda Wose Photography
• Ceremony and reception site and catering: The Hay-Adams
• Coordinator: Lois Gaul, Kelley Cannon Events 
• Videographer: Carlisle Films
• Flowers/Florist: A Morgan Floral
• Invitations: The Dandelion Patch
• Place cards and menus: Etsy
• Officiant: Rev. Christina Rock, Ceremony Officiants 
• Attire: Mark Powell Bespoke
• Accessories: Brackish
• Hair and makeup: Priscilla M Beauty
• Rings: Asprey London; Bulgari 
• Bagpipes, Duncan Moore
• Cake: Buttercream Bakeshop
• Rentals: DC Rental; Edge Floral Event Designers
• Favors: White Confetti Box
• Lighting: Encore Global